Dumbledore's Army
by Lotiolentus
Summary: What happened at Hogwarts in 7th year? Snape helped the D.A. in the Room Of Requirement. First, he has to gain their trust. DH compliant. Dumbledore meddling, boggarts, veritaserum, abused Harry, exhausted Snape. No slash, no romance. More reviews, PLEASE
1. Chapter I OBLIVIATE!

**Obliviate!**

Luna Lovegood slowly walked towards the Headmaster's Office. The smile on her face - that smile that made it seem as if she knew a secret no one else did, wouldn't leave her face, even when she realised how great the risks were.

Looking around, making sure no one was there, she whispered the password to the gargoyles: Dumbledore.

"Come in."

Luna entered the round Office, not without admiring Dumbledore's taste. And the fact that Snape hadn't changed anything in here.

"Headmaster Snape." She pulled out her wand and put it on the table before her. In Snape's reach.

With a small nod, she allowed him to take it, but the headmaster didn't move. Handing over your weapon was a sign of trust. Snape knew that and his eyes showed confusion before he managed to retrieve his expressionless mask.

"Headmaster, I require your help."

Without being asked, she sat down.

"You have two choices..." she started and cleared her throat. "...either you teach me how to perform occlumency or I have to be obliviated."

Snape looked weary. He had absolutely no clue what this girl was talking about, but if she was anything like her father it would be about Crumple-Horned Snorkacks or Nargles...

"Miss Lovegood, I have no time for your silly _games_. I will not..."

She put a finger on her lip to stop his rant and the sheer cheek of this gesture made him fall silent.

"Headmaster, my father and I are in danger. The Quibbler now openly takes sides..."

Snape leaned back and regarded the strange blond girl.

"I cannot help you", he said finally, unable to remove the small hint of regret from his voice.

Luna smiled. "Yes, headmaster, I am quite aware of that. However, if I ever get captured... there is a possibility that I will spill out your secrets to You-Know-Who himself."

Snape's mouth nearly fell open and he quickly made a move for Luna's wand.

She grabbed his hand and stared at him... as if searching for something. Her hand was rested on his and she concentrated hard to transfer all sympathy and comfort she felt for the potions master into that touch.

"Lily Evans..." she started, without taking her big blue eyes of him... "invented the greasy hair hex. She used it on you. Maybe when she was angry. You never removed it. You must have loved her very much. I am very sorry that she hasn't left something better for you to remember her."

Snape's breath escaped with a hissing noise and he broke the eye contact to stare at Luna's hand.

"Headmaster, I have spent a lot of time in the forbidden forest last year. I overheard a few conversations between you and Professor Dumbledore. I am very sorry you were the one who had to..."

Snape jumped up, pointing Luna's wand at her chest. Luna flinched a little when she heard the heavy chair crash on the floor. It was a nice chair.

"How much do you know?" his voice sounded more harsh and threatening than he had intended it to be.

Luna raised from her seat, her hair streaming out behind her. She still showed no fear. But trust.

"I know that you have been protecting us. I know that you have made sure we weren't exposed to the Carrows more than necessary. I know you have no allies. I know I admire you."

Snape suddenly looked very tired. And old.

"There is no need for that." What was supposed to be sarcasm came out as a pathetic whisper.

"Rather the opposite, headmaster. Almost everyone is burdened with grave mistakes from the past which lead to someone being harmed."

Snape winced and turned away before she continued.

"...but after all these years... you still take it _that _hard. I think that is rare. And rather admirable."

Luna studied her favourite teacher for a long time, searching. She wanted to know if her words had arrived.

Snape was breathless. And speechless for that matter.

She lent forward, begging him to maintain the eye-contact and continued, fearless.

"She would have been very grateful you know. You have done a very good job protecting Harry."

Snape swallowed hard. He couldn't believe the courage and wisdom that girl possessed. Not reckless, thoughtless Gryffindor courage, but rather clever and calculating.

"I cannot teach occlumency, Miss Lovegood. The risks are too high. Unfortunately I am forced to choose the second option."

Luna shook her head slightly. "It's not a very nice job, is it." Her voice was full of regret. "But it has to be done."

Then she considered him with the most earnest, appreciative smile he had ever seen. "Thank you for everything headmaster."

After a second of hesitation... No one had smiled at him for months, he raised Luna's wand again.

"Obliviate!" he whispered and followed it up with a louder:

"CONFUNDO!".

"Miss Lovegood. You remember not one conversation between Dumbledore and myself in the forest. You cannot trust me. You are wrong." He rounded the spell up with a silent "Ennervate."

Luna blinked, confused. The smile was wiped from her face and quickly replaced by sadness and disappointment. Her large blue eyes filled with tears.

Snape pulled himself together, smirked and handed her wand over to her. She had been very clever. Knowing that the Dark Lord would check all the spells that were cast from his wand, she had offered him her own.

"Fifty points from Ravenclaw for disobedience. Dismissed."

"Headmaster... I don't trust you anymore..."

Snape winced a little and tried hard to force some sarcasm into his voice.

"Oh well, Lovegood. That's my belief system destroyed. I suppose I should go to bed and cry my eyes out."

Luna turned around and ran off. Snape seemed to hear a muttered "maybe you should" but he wasn't sure.

She kept running, and didn't turn around, even when she heard loud thumping and things breaking in the headmaster's office.


	2. Chapter II MOURNING

**Mourning.**

"Severus. The pleasure is all yours."

The Dark Lord's red eyes were locked to Snape's.

It was an order. The tall thin man with the crooked nose regarded the "pleasure" the Dark Lord had in mind. It was the killing of a young family. Voldemort had been obsessed with killing families with small children. Preferrably one child. Preferrably a_ boy_.

Just to prove his powers, to prove that he _could _and that Potter had been a one-off. A glitch.

"My Lord. Your powers are not questioned."

Thin ice. He doubted that the Dark Lord would spare them. No. He _knew _that he wouldn't.

"_CRUCIO_!"

The small family now screamed in agony. The mother, even under the cruciatus curse kept an eye on her baby and it seemed that seeing her son being tortured distracted her from it. Her son's torture was much much worse for her than her own.

Snape cringed and looked away. When Voldemort finally stopped the curse, the two muggles were unconscious. The child, a muggle-born wizard was awake. Crying.

"Never. _NEVER _question my power again."

The Dark Lord was in a rage now. Severus, who knew him best, gazed at him, convinced that they wouldn't leave this house before all three of them were dead. He wanted it to end fast. He could not bear to stay any longer.

"My Lord. Time is pressing."

Voldemort gave him a curt nod and finally sent the small family into oblivion.

First the father, then the mother, then the child.

"My Lord. I will apparate to Hogwarts now. Dumbledore's protective wards are difficult to destroy. I will have to start."

And with a _pop_, he disapparated.

* * *

Luna Lovegood had been locked out the Ravenclaw Tower again. As usual, she didn't mind. Everything happened for a reason, she really did believe that. Whith her sphinx-worthy smile, she watched the silvery doe in front of her and wonder who had cast it. She frowned a little when she tried to remember. It was as if she had once known but couldn't access that memory.

Suddenly she heard a familiar "pop". Someone had apparated very close. She looked around and saw a dark hooded figure with a death eater mask.Hiding a little further, she watched with interest. She couldn't sense a threat from this person. The figure took the mask off and when she saw the despise and carelessness of that action, she relaxed. It was obviously someone who didn't want to be a Death Eater.

It was the headmaster.

She smiled a little when she remembered the little occlumency book that was lying on her bedside table. She had also written a note to herself that said that she had to trust him but she mustn't know why. Dumbledore always had and there must have been a reason for it. She had figured that Snape must have obliviated her last week, to ensure everyone's security.

She thought about Dumbledore's hand and how nobody seemed to have spotted that the curse he obviously had caught was spreading. She knew all about those curses and wondered how he had managed to still be live. When she found out from Harry that Snape had killed Dumbledore she knew fine well that the former headmaster was dying anyway. She knew that if Snape hadn't killed him, he would have died a slow and painful death. Of course she didn't share the information with the boy who had a direct connection to Voldemort's mind, there must have been a reason why he didn't know that. But she admired her favourite teacher all the more. People should have a right to die in dignity.

The headmaster didn't seem to be doing too well. He walked towards the lake and sat down, leaning against a tree. Maybe he needed time to sort himself out before returning to the school? When she saw him shivering, she cast a warming spell in his direction, too strong to be unnoticed. Snape turned around and the expression in his face broke her heart.

_What are they doing to him?_

"Headmaster..." she whispered. "Would you be so kind to take the charm off me now? I think I have mastered occlumency... I think. Thank you for the book you left for me."

Snape, now distracted from the immense guilt he felt because he couldn't help that small family -

_He should have been able to prevent their death somehow._

- regarded the strange blonde girl who - again - offered her wand to perform the spell. It was impossible that she could have learnt it so fast. He had wondered why he even gave her the book. With a small sigh, he cast a silent legilimens and what he saw in Luna's mind astounded him. She had created the most curious wall around her thoughts and memories. It looked and felt hand-knitted with pure... _love_and in the strangest patterns he had ever seen. This wall had the same aura a hand-knitted baby-hat had, carefully made by an overtired mother with no magic at all. Impossible for the Dark Lord to stay in that mind for more a split second. The power the Dark Lord knows not. Maybe Dumbledore _did _have a point.

Without further thinking, he removed the spell he had performed with muttered incantations and that appreciative smile... the only smile that was directed towards him since he had killed Dumbledore, came back.

"Thank you headmaster."

Luna sensed the troubled soul she had in front of her and with a flick of a wand conjured a second mug and filled it with tea from her flask. She didn't ask him if he wanted any, because she had no intention of hearing a _no _from someone who wanted nothing more than to say _yes_. He accepted it and silently turned back to the lake. With curiosity, she watched the silvery doe that stood on the other end.

"That's very pretty."

The haunted man next to her didn't respond. Not that she expected him to. When the doe disappeared into the woods, she could somehow sense the immense sadness that surrounded the headmaster. This doe was _his _patronus. When she looked at him, she doubted he would ever cast one again.

"What happened?"

"It is none of your concern, Miss Lovegood."

She took another sip of her tea and concentrated hard to use the mental connection between that two that the headmaster had opened. It was even harder, because he refused eye contact.

_Show me. I have to help or we will lose everything._

Snape, still reluctant, wanted to close that connection and go back to the castle, but he was unable to. Almost automatically and against his will, the scene he just had to witness, no, the scene he was an active part of, came to the forefront of his mind. Luna's eyes widened, if that was at all possible and tears dropped down her cheeks.

_He should have stopped the Dark Lord. He could have saved them_. _There must have been another way. They had to die for the _Greater Good_ without even knowing that there was one._

He hated the Greater Good. More than he hated the Dark Lord. He hated everything.

Without conveying any messages, Luna broke the connection and looked away. When he regarded her, he was glad to see that someone was shedding tears for that family. That _had _to count for something.

Luna was searching for something in her bag and he was astounded to see what it was. Muggle cigarettes. He hadn't smoked for more than 20 years.

She lit it with her wand and passed it to him, and then did the same thing for herself. With shaking hands, he accepted.

"You know..." her glance fixed on the lake now "When I was nine... I went outside in the middle of the night to look for nargles. I was searching for hours and when I came back, my mother was hysterical. She was so upset, that she cast a smacking spell which hit my hands. She then walked away from me, leaving her wand in my reach. I was angry. I took the wand and wished... that the next spell she cast would backfire. She then came back and asked me to go upstairs. I thought I would be punished, but she... wanted to show me something. She cast a spell and it backfired. Minutes later she was dead."

Snape looked at her, horrified. He wasn't sure he wanted to know this, and he did wonder, why she would trust him with information like that.

"After that... I was in St. Mungo's for months because I tried to destroy my own magic. I never wanted to use it again. I thought it had been my fault that she was dead, but... at the end, they convinced me that... it would only have been my fault if her death was my intention."

She moved closer to Snape and whispered: "You never _wanted _to kill anyone. You are not one of _them_."

Luna admired Snape's strength. The ice he was walking on was so thin - too thin, but he just kept going. She put one hand on his shoulder and slightly squeezed it. He didn't move. His breath escaped with a shaky hissing noise and she knew he wouldn't be able to fight much longer.

She quickly conjured a jar and said firmly: "Put that memory in here. Or it will destroy you. Use my wand."

With shaking hands, he pointed the wand to his temple and tried to remove it. It didn't work. He was unable to do so. Maybe he didn't _want _to forget... Or maybe it didn't work because he couldn't use his own wand for this... Or because he couldn't hold his hand steady...

"Go away," he croaked. "_Go_."

He pulled out his wand and pointed it at her, shoving her back. She turned around and slowly walked towards the castle.

When she looked back, she saw her favourite teacher slumped forward and clutching his stomach as if he was going to be sick. He gasped for breath and let out a deep howl. It sounded scary. Tormented.

Luna cringed a little.

And then turned around and ran back. She knelt down in front of him, took his clammy, icecold hands into hers and concentrated hard until they started glowing with warmth. He gave her a surprised look and she used the eye contact to re-establish the connection.

The force of the thoughts nearly threw her back, but she focused.

_Get a grip Snivellus Get a grip Snivellus Get a grip Snivellus Get a grip Snivellus Get a grip Snivellus Get a grip Snivellus Get a grip Snivellus Get a grip Snivellus Get a grip Snivellus Get a grip Snivellus Get a grip Snivellus Get a grip Snivellus Get a grip Snivellus Get a -_

_Stop_. _Please. Stop. You're not like them_.

She gently pushed him over, supporting his weight until he was lying on his back. One hand was placed on his chest, her hand still glowing, one held her wand and was pointed to his temple.

_Give me it. I will remember them for you._

The silvery string, not gas, not liquid escaped and Snape cringed. It was hurting him. She put it in a small cup, not taking her hand off his chest. She pressed it gently, in the rhythm he was supposed to breathe. It seemed to work.

Then she let go. With a groan and under great effort, he sat back up.

Luna transformed the small cup with the memories into a beautiful wooden box, then transformed a stick into a sharp spade and started digging. She didn't use magic, she had always thought digging graves with a wand that was the "_easy way out_".

It didn't take as long as she thought. She pushed her hair back, which was now dusty and sweaty. The box fit in it perfectly. Now using her wand, she quickly shovelled the sand back and created a small, wooden cross. And a beautiful, red rose. Before her eyes, it transformed into a lily.

She turned around and as relieved that the headmaster had somewhat regained his composure.

He looked at her, furrowing his brow as if he expected her to laugh at him, but she would never do such a thing. Never. She smiled instead, conjuring two glasses of firewhisky and her cigarettes.

"Thank you."


	3. Chapter III RECRUITMENT

**Recruitment.**

"Thank you."

Luna smiled again. "You're welcome. Are you feeling better?"

Snape froze. He couldn't remember the last time anyone had asked him how he was feeling. He truly didn't know if anyone ever _did _asked him. Usually, after questions like those, there was an awkward silence because Severus never answered them, but not this time.

He cleared his throat.

"So..." he cleared his throat again, "How is the D.A.?"

Her face became serious and somewhat professional. No mentioning of blibbering humdingers. Snape wondered, and not for the first time, if she truly believed in her father's nonsense or if she used to hide her knowledge and intellect.

"Information can only be shared with members of the army."

Snape nodded approvingly. He hadn't expected anything else.

"You can join."

That was unexpected. He had to smirk a little thinking about it. His situation would become so complicated even _he _would have trouble understanding it.

He shook his head. "Too dangerous."

Luna gave him a quick look. "I think it is as safe as it can get. Ginny, Neville and I are the only ones who would know."

Snape frowned. It was unwise to trust. He knew this since before he could talk. There weren't many six-month olds who could perform wandless cleaning charms.

Luna sighed. "The Room Of Requirement... is immune to time. We have spent months in there, training. When we leave, only minutes have passed. Neville has mastered the commands."

Snape gasped and his mouth nearly fell open again. All year he wondered why some of the former D.A. members looked so mature. Because they had aged in there. Longbottom was a man now, his insecurities gone. The youngest Weasley had lost her baby face. Lovegood looked like a woman.

She threw away her cigarette, then pointed her wand at it so it would disappear.

"It is also a place... to breathe. You are breaking, headmaster. I doubt that you will be able to go on like this for much longer."

She scrutinised him, paying attention to every little detail that gave away the degree of his exhaustion. The weight loss, the trembling hands, the paleness, the ever increasing bitterness.

"There are a few tasks you need to fulfill to join. Your trust will be tested. And once you have proven yourself worthy, protection will be granted. Come at 8pm tomorrow. Don't be seen. Oh yes... you have to bring a present for each of us."

Luna stood up, gave Snape a last smile and walked slowly towards the castle. She looked as if she was floating.

Severus took one last look at the lake and wondered if again, he was being manipulated.


	4. Chapter IV PRESENTS

I would like some feedback... I know, pathetic but...

* * *

**Presents.**

It was five minutes to eight and Snape felt like a fool. What on _earth _was he doing here, waiting for loser Longbottom, the Lovegood oddity and the Weasley hurricane?

He had spent the day preparing the "_presents_" he was supposed to bring for the three leaders of Dumbledore's Army. He was relieved that not all members would witness his upcoming humiliation. But also filled with curiosity about their plans. The last 24 hours... no the last few months had changed him. The constant sleep deprivation was challenging his sanity. Most meetings with the Dark Lord took place in the middle of the night. Most Death Eaters were able to sleep during the day. He wasn't.

"Headmaster." Longbottom, Lovegood and Weasley gave him a nod and they entered the Room Of Requirement. The fact that he was able to enter it, astounded them a little. He had obviously managed to overcome the first ward.

Longbottom had done a good job preparing the room. Beds, a washroom, a library, a cleared space for dueling, a kitchen, a sofa, a fireplace and Dumbledore's portrait. And a large wooden box.

As soon as the door closed behind them, the three of them relaxed. They obviously felt at home here. Longbottom made tea for four and for some reason, Severus was surprised that there was one for him as well. He passed it to him. Too milky. Too weak. But Severus bit his lip. It wouldn't be a good idea to start this with a criticism.

"In Order to be accepted here..." Ginny started, not without glaring at him defiantly, "you have to pass tests. You have to face a boggart, answer questions under the influence of veritaserum, cast a patronus and ask Professor Dumbledore for permission to enter."

Snape nodded. His stomach felt quesy. All four tasks would difficult to master. Maybe not the last. There was a possibility, that all of this was part of the _Great Plan_.

He hadn't uttered a word yet. Luna walked towards him and with a curt gesture, demanded his wand. Snape handed it over. By the look of everyone's faces, he had obviously passed another test.

"First I need you to understand," Neville started, not a hint of insecurity in his voice, "that in here, we are all equals. You are in no position of power. If you fail the tests, you will be obliviated and then you can go."

"Very well, Longbottom."

Neville noticed the lack of malice in Snape's voice.

"What have you brought?"

The presents. A little nervous, he pulled out three small boxes.

"You have to remove the feather weight charm and the shrinking charm."

Luna pointed her wand at the small boxes and one of them grew very large, one of them didn't change at all and one only enlarged a little.

Snape, still unable to banish that annoying tremble, pointed at the middle-sized one and Neville started to open it. Two vials with potions, neatly corked. Neville gave him a enquiring look.

"This," Snape said quietly, "is to be administered to your parents. It can reverse the effects of the cruciatus curse. It was very difficult to brew. Taken twice a day, it works after 12 weeks. The cruciatus curse can cause permanent damage to the nerves, as it has to your parents. This should help."

Neville opened his mouth to ask why Snape hasn't given him this before, but Snape was faster.

"It took ten years to brew. I finished it this summer, but the events..." he trailed off.

Neville nodded. "Thank you sir" he whispered. "Thank you so much." He hadn't expected something as personal as that. His determination to win this war and to... survive increased by ten. Snape gave him a curt nod and rubbed his eyes with his palms.

He wasn't sure if he could stay awake any longer. He hadn't slept in nearly three days.

"Coffee sir?" Ginny asked and Snape nodded thankfully.

When she came back, they exchanged coffee for her present. She unwrapped it and nearly laughed when she saw what Snape got for her.

"Wedding rings?"

Two furrows appeared on his forehead. "Portkeys. They are for you and... Potter once the war is over. Turn it three times and it takes you both to a safe place."

"Where?"

"Right here."

Her eyes widened. Trying to force the excitement out her voice she asked: "How do we know the ring and the potion is real?"

Snape's gaze fell on the veritaserum. With a slight shudder, he responded: "Ask me later."

Luna's present was so big, she couldn't move it. Ever-floating, she approached it and opened the box. She held her breath when she saw it. A pensieve. They were rare and difficult to get. Not many of them existed.

"Miss Lovegood. After last night's events I thought you would profit from some... piece of mind every now and again. Memories can also be viewed."

She nodded, not taking her eyes off Snape. "Thank you."

The three of them were speechless. No one had expected old, greasy Snape to bring such valuable and personal things.


	5. Chapter V VERITASERUM

panther73110: _You said this was a sequel to Dumbledore Orders but it doesn't even sound like for one Dumbledore is dead and he didn't die in your story Dumbledore Orders? _

Good point actually. It's not really sequel because there is a year and a bit missing... I removed that bit, sorry… However, the characters will refer to what happened in "Dumbledore's Orders". So it's still kind of a sequel...

StoogegirlSilva: _Good story. I would say that the chapters were a little too short, but the bulk posting made up for that. Interesting story, please continue. And make sure that Snape gets loads of huggles (hugs and snuggles.)_

I'll try. But he's kinda stiff and bulky, it's hard. I do want to think that his 7th year wasn't that bad and that a few people did know. If he thought Dumbledore had raised Harry to die, why would he give Harry the memories? Correct, the purpose might have that Harry wouldn't die thinking good old Snivellus was a traitor.

Doesn't mean that no-one else knows his true loyalties, does it?

* * *

**Veritaserum**. 

Ginny was the first to talk again. After all, she wasn't called _hurricane _for nothing. In her opinion, Snape was _trying_, but it took more than that to gain her trust. He was a Death Eater, after all. She pointed her wand at him and muttered "Finite Incantatem."

It was standard procedure, usually nothing happened. Apart from the cuts on Hannah's arms. She made a sad grimace when she thought about Hannah. She did attend all meetings, but she looked so... broken since her mother's death. She didn't attend any lessons anymore either.

She flinched a little when she saw what the spell had done to the most hated teacher right after Umbridge and the Carrows. Dark circles appeared under his eyes and a faded bruise on his cheek.

His black eyes flashed with anger and his face hardened. He was allergic to public exposure.

"We have potions for that, Professor..." Luna started.

Snape snorted. "I'm sure _you _do. Mine have all been taken."

He didn't say stolen.

"Sorry. We needed them..."

"I'm aware of that, Miss Weasley. I wouldn't have let you take them otherwise."

The three looked at each other. Another surprise.

"Okay," Neville said awkwardly. "Veritaserum. It's standard procedure, we all had to do it."

"Who brewed it Longbottom?"

Neville gave him a defiant look. "It was me, professor. And no, it won't kill you, no it won't cause kidney damage, no it won't make your hair red, no, I didn't explode the cauldron. I made it properly."

"_Brewed_." Snape corrected.

Neville sighed and threw his arms up as if Snape was a lost case. Maybe he was. He didn't want to be bullied by Snape in the room he had tried so hard to make suitable and _comfortable_. But the Snape in here wasn't the same as the one out there. It seemed that after Dumbledore's Death, the Carrows, the ministry, there was so much _nastiness _going on out there that not even _Snape _wanted to continue it in here.

"Very well then Longbottom. Let's see."

"Sit down please", Luna said with a smile. He did. The three of them were standing.

Neville passed him the vial and Snape drank the contents in one gulp. Ginny scanned him with her wand, making sure he really drank it. She earned a glare, but didn't mind.

Snape raised an eyebrow. The potion wasn't working yet. "Well done Longbottom. It seems you finally managed..." he fell silent and his face became expressionless. It was working. Neville blushed a little. In one night, he had received a present and a compliment from the person he hated most... Right after Voldemort and Lestrange. And it wasn't even his birthday yet. He smirked a little and picked up the list they had prepared together.

"Name?"

"Severus Tobias Snape"

"Profession?"

"Headmaster."

It always had to be tested with standard questions, just in case. Neville scrutinised his headmaster. He looked tired... beyond breaking point. His eyes were unfocused, his hair greasy.

"Are you immune to veritaserum?"

Funny question to ask. It made no sense.

"Nobody is. It's a rumour." Snape's voice sounded flat and slightly distant.

Neville cleared his throat. _Now the uncomfortable questions_...

"Where do your loyalties lie?"

"Albus Dumbledore."

"Since when?"

"Ever since the Dark Lord applied Trelawney's prophecy to the Potters. That was sixteen years ago."

"Why?"

"I was in love with Lily Potter."

"Did you ever..." he got carried away, but Luna interrupted him. "Neville! You don't ask things like that."

"Right. The list." They were all relieved that Snape wouldn't recall the questioning. Neville continued.

"Why did you join in the first place?"

"I was a fool. I was not welcome in the Order, Black and Potter objected. At the time I thought there was no other option to do... great things."

Neville and Ginny frowned.

"Do you regret it?"

"I have since the day I joined."

"How is Harry?"

"As far as I know, Potter is safe. He is on a mission to eliminate all possibilities for the Dark Lord to return. After that, he will seek to fight the Dark Lord himself."

Ginny let out a sigh of relief. At least he was safe. She wished that he was here, he could train here, and hide, but obviously, Dumbledore had other ideas for him. She frowned a little when she recalled a few things Luna told her about Dumbledore.

"How did Professor Dumbledore die?"

"On a mission to destroy a part of the Dark Lord's soul, his hand was cursed. I managed to constrain the curse, but he had less than a year to live. He asked me to kill him to prevent a slow and painful death. He also didn't want Draco's soul damaged. Draco was trying all year to execute the Dark Lord's order to kill Dumbledore. Narcissa and I made the unbreakable vow to protect Draco which suited Dumbledore just fine. I cursed him with the killing curse. If I hadn't cursed him, he would have died a few weeks later."

"How could you do that?" This wasn't part of the plan, but Neville was still curious.

"I couldn't. I begged him to change his mind but he got very angry. However, once he was disarmed by Draco and threatened by Greyback, Lestrange and Carrow..."

Neville winced. If his parents were asking him to kill him just to escape Lestrange's torture... he would do it as well.

"Okay okay" he said nervously. Ginny and Luna looked sombre.

Ginny pointed back at the list, but Neville wanted to know something else.

"Why do you hate me so much?"

"Because for sixteen years I wished the Dark Lord had killed your parents instead of the Potters. And I didn't much like the fact that I had thoughts like that. You didn't show the talent your..."

"Stop. Fine, I don't want to know."

"Neville. Just stick to the list. Nearly done." said Ginny and ran her hands through her hair nervously.

Neville nodded and licked his lips.

"Okay... now just for the record, because we should know... Illnesses?"

"Asthma, atopic eczema, depression. Minor nerve damage due repeated exposure to the cruciatus curse."

"Patronus?"

"A doe. Like Lily's."

"Okay. Luna, the antidote."

Ginny raised her hand. "One more question. Why did you cut George's ear off?"

"It was an accident. I wanted to disarm McNair. He was about about to kill Lupin."

Ginny relaxed.

Luna got the small vial and handed it to Snape. "Drink this."

Snape drank the antidote, again, in one gulp. After a few seconds, he started to focus again. Luna offered him her cigarettes and a glass of fire whisky. Snape accepted.

"I-Its more comfortable over there", Ginny muttered and they sat on the sofas, staring into the fireplace. Snape regarded them and expected mocking looks. Or smirking. Laughing. He saw nothing but... surprise and something else he couldn't quite read. Maybe it was pity. He didn't want anyone's pity. Or did he? He wasn't so sure anymore. Of anything, really. He was sure that all the secrecy... the lack of sleep, the lack of allies, of anyone he could trust was more than he could handle. He was being feared and hated by everyone in the school, teachers, pupils, no exceptions. His inability to find anyone to trust or open up to was finally taking its toll. Frankly, he had enough of secrecy.


	6. Chapter VI GINNY'S REVENGE

StoogegirlSilva: Thanks for correcting the typos and German mistakes. We have biests here, he he

* * *

**Ginny's Revenge**

Ginny Weasley sat on the sofa, smoking and frowning. "Right. He passed the first test." Her frown didn't move. She glared at Snape, the hostility that he had seen since he became headmaster, had returned.

Snape glared back, even though he didn't know where the sudden hatred came from. Neville looked at her nervously, before he turned towards the exhausted looking headmaster. "Before we continue... What do you think Dumbledore will say?"

Ginny snorted. "Sod _him_. I have no respect for the man after what he did to Harry." Snape wondered for a second if she was talking about him. It would have been possible. Ginny flicked her cigarette in the fireplace... she was rather skilled at it and pointed her wand at Dumbledore's portrait and cast a covering charm.

"Calm down Ginny..." Neville tried.

"I will _NOT _calm down. He sent him to those... beasts and just left him there to _STEW_. I _HATE _him for that."

Snape cleared his throat. "Miss Weasley, are you referring to Mr. and Mrs. Dursley?"

Ginny threw the glass she had in her hand in the fireplace. Everyone shuddered a little. Ginny was, after all, famous for having inherited her mother's temper.

"Yes I am. Dumbledore left him with _them_. Did you know how they treated him?" She didn't wait for an answer. "For years, my mother tried to get Dumbledore to just listen to her. He would have none of it. They kept him in a cupboard for ten years. Can you imagine that? The boy who defeated Voldemort as a baby kept in a cupboard under the stairs. Starved him. Hit him. Called him names. Made him do all the chores."

The silence was deafening.

"That fat cousin of his got _everything _and he wouldn't even receive a present for his birthday." Ginny's eyes were glittering with tears now and Neville and Luna were dumbstruck. They had learnt that it wasn't a good idea to interrupt when she worked herself up like this. "We had to send him parcels to survive the summers. Whenever he came back, he was skinny and had bruises all over him. Mum tried so hard. But no, Harry had to suffer for the _Greater Good_. For the _plan_. Those _bloody _wards."

Her gaze fell on Snape and if he hadn't been so skilled at self-discipline, he would have flinched. She walked towards him, pointing her wand at him.

"Did you know, Snape?" Again, not waiting for answer. "You know what? Nobody made sure he was okay. Happy. Loved. None of you. Every year, he asked if he could stay at Hogwarts. But Dumbledore wouldn't _fucking _listen to him. Not once. He was too busy using everyone for his _PLAN_. Oh, you have failed him badly. All of you."

"I-" Snape tried, but Ginny still hadn't finished her lecture.

"Don't even try to make excuses, Snape. You tried so hard to make his life at Hogwarts miserable, too. Just because he looks like his father."

"He never said anything... and he _behaved _like his father..."

Neville's and Luna's eyes widened. They knew what was about to follow.

"Oh, it's _Harry's_ fault now? I have no idea what happened, but Harry _hates _his father. How on _earth _did you make him hate his own dad? He's dead and you missed no opportunity to badmouth him. If you loved Harry's mum, _truly _loved her, you should have made sure her baby was okay. Why didn't you? Oh _Merlin_, I hate you."

"GINNY! Stop it! Can't you see what you are doing to him?" Luna turned her wide eyes towards the headmaster.

She couldn't see. She was blind with rage.

The three turned towards Snape and gasped when they saw the state he was in. He was so pale he looked green. His eyes looked too dark for the paleness. The rings under his eyes were even more pronounced now. He cleared his throat and his voice sounded hoarse.

"When Potter-"

"Harry." Ginny insisted. Snape ignored her.

"When he was six, Dumbledore sent Shacklebolt and myself to make sure Potter was being looked after. Arabella Figg, the squib next door neighbour had been concerned about him. We went to check on him and he was... it was winter and he had to spend the night outside in a shed. I spent the whole night administering potions and healing his wounds. He showed all signs of physical abuse. Shacklebolt and I went to Dumbledore the next morning, wanting to report the... maltreatment he had suffered. On the way there, Lucius Malfoy had confunded us. We reported that he was well looked after and... being spoilt by his relatives."

"The Death Eaters wanted to _destroy _Harry...", Luna whispered.

"Exactly. Miss Lovegood. Ten points for Ravenclaw."

Ginny, who was crying, returned to reality. "You cannot give or take points in here."

Snape nodded.

"During an occlumency lesson, when Potter was in fifth year, I saw a rather... painful memory of his home life. I showed it to Albus and Minerva. After discussions on how to proceed, Potter's decision was to stay with the Dursleys for the summers, but use defensive spells if they ever tried to threaten him again. It was also agreed that the amount of time he spent there was kept to a minimum."

Ginny gasped.

"I can't believe it." She took Luna's glass out her hand and threw it at Dumbledore's portrait.

"I can't _believe _it! He sent him back there after Sirius died. I do doubt that Vernon or Petunia Dursley tried to comfort him. And I doubt that Harry would have used any magic there after what happened after the Dementor attack. It's all deliberate. Dumbledore made sure he had a miserable life at home to assure Harry's gratefulness for the wizarding world. And his determination to kill You-Know-Who. Oh for _Merlin's_ sake..."

She stormed off and locked herself in the washroom. Luna was very quick offering cigarettes for everybody.

When Ginny had stopped screaming her heart out, she came out the washroom and looked slightly embarrassed.

"So... _professor_. Why on _earth _do you hate Harry so much?"

Snape made an ugly grimace and turned away. "His father... and his friends were bullies. Actual bullies. They did not miss out any opportunities to humiliate or hex... me. He reminded me so much of him and not of... _her_." It was an effort for him to speak those words, to admit weakness, but what did it matter now?

"But Harry is not a bully", Neville remarked. "He hates it when..."

Snape brushed his comments away with a hand movement. "Longbottom, I do realise that. _Now_. After I found out that there was a direct connection from Potter's to the Dark Lords mind, I was however, in no position to show any... pleasantries without giving away my status as a spy. You cannot imagine the Dark Lord's rage when he found out that I was teaching him occlumency. The lessons had to stop. And Potter gave me a good excuse to do so."

Severus remembered the last occlumency lesson with the boy and winced a little.

"Did he torture you?" Luna asked quietly.

_Damn _that girl. Why did she always have to be so _direct_? Snape remained silent. The three of them shuddered, taking the silence as a _yes_.

Snape stalked to the kitchen and put the kettle on. For some reason, he didn't like tea made by magic. Or by Longbottom.

"Anyone?"

"Yes, please." Neville answered. "Lots of milk please. Ginny likes her tea strong. Luna's sweet and milky." Snape nodded.

After they all relaxed with a mug of tea in their hands, Luna did insist, that Snape's looked disgusting and more like coffee. Snape was the first one to speak.

"If I remember correctly, the next... tantalisation is the boggart?"

Neville smirked when he remembered that his boggart was once Snape.

"Correct. Ten points for Slytherin" he replied dryly.

Luna and Ginny grinned.

"I think...", Luna replied, stealing a glance at Ginny, "you have just been confronted with yours."

Ginny, Luna and Neville laughed. Snape stared at them, then rubbed his face tiredly and muttered: "Ridiculous."

The laughter became almost hysterical.


	7. Chapter VII BOGGART

**Boggart.**

After they had all calmed down, Neville decided that Snape still had to do the boggart. Then the initiation rite and they were finished for the day.

"What is this?" Snape turned his black gaze towards them, something raw flickering in his eyes, before he managed to retrieve his mask. "I am sorely reminded of muggle sects."

None of them had been raised by muggles, so they shot him a quizzical look, but Snape didn't illuminate them.

Ginny turned around and reached for Snape's wand and passed it to him. "So. Your turn. Have you ever managed to banish one?" Snape glared her her as if it was an absurd question. He was, after all, a former Death Eater, former professor, headmaster, potions master, Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher...

He frowned slightly, then shook his head slightly, stood up and pointed his wand at the wooden box. He gasped when he saw a flash of black, greasy hair. With a crash, the man opened the door and towered in front of Snape who suddenly seemed much smaller.

"BOY! You haven't changed at all, have you? Loser as usual. Oh you are so weak. You disgusted me the minute you were born. He held a belt in his hand and swung it towards Snape.

He flinched. And ducked.

The boggart changed into his mother. She had a black eye and greasy hair. "Severus... why didn't you help me? Maybe your father is right. You know I wouldn't have hung myself if you had helped me. You are a coward. COWARD!"

Snape staggared backwards and gagged. Luna, Ginny and Neville stared at the boggart. They had seen more than fifty of them in the past few weeks, but this one was the worst. By far. They knew not to intervene though. Snape had to do it himself, or he wouldn't be able to join.

The boggart turned into Lily. She didn't say anything at first, but came close to him, her eyes full of tears. And as accusatory as eyes could get.

"Severus. Why did you do it?"

"Lily, I-" She blurred before his eyes he cursed himself for being so weak. It was just a boggart. It wasn't really _her_.

He closed his eyes and muttered "Riddikulus." But he couldn't think of anything funny. There _was _nothing funny.

When he opened them again, he saw her lying on the floor, her eyes stared into nothingness. She was dead. Then transformed into Harry. He was just dressed in boxers. His ribs, spine, cheekbones stuck out and he was covered in bruises, gashes and welts. His green eyes, Lily's eyes were wide open and stared at him. His glasses were broken. For some reason, that little fact disturbed him most. He wouldn't be able to _see _without his glasses. Ginny screamed and wanted to run towards Harry, but Neville held her back and put his and in front of her eyes.

Snape covered his face with his hands. He fell on his knees and screamed the most agonising scream anyone had ever heard.

The boggart quickly changed into James Potter. The three of them gasped when they saw how much he looked like Harry.

"That's it Snivellus. You killed them all. I was always right about you, you are a _MURDERER_! How could you _EVER _think that Lily would have loved YOU? She just had sympathy for you, that was all. Look where it got her. Here, I will show you your future. That's what you _really _deserve."

He changed into a dementor.

"Expexto Patronum." Snape tried, but nothing happened. The dementor floated closer until he was close enough to suck the soul out of him.

"EXPECTO PATRONUM!" The silver doe escaped his wand. The dementor shrunk and disappeared back into the cupboard.

With an empty gaze, Snape stood up, under enormous effort. He towered in front of the three. Neville, Luna and Ginny were now really scared and stared up at him. They expected nothing less than the killing curse. Or the worst cruciatus ever performed.

"This..." he whispered quietly. Deadly. "Is _evil_. Don't ever think that your methods are any better than Dumbledore's."


	8. Chapter VIII SECRETS

Thanks for the reviews :)... TBH, I could do with some feedback, I have only a rough idea what would be following now... and some more reviews please please

StoogegirlSilva Thank thank for spending time on this story, I grew fond of it :)

The room is kinda older than the rest of Hogwarts, so I'll try and find a way to get Harry in, by accident, joined by newborn Albus Severus... sound good?

* * *

**Secrets.**

"Sir," Luna licked her lips and gazed at him, searching for something in his face. "I reacted just the same way as you did." Ginny and Neville shuddered and nodded, both surrounded by sombreness.

"The initiation tactics are created by Dumbledore himself. He left a book that described them. The important passages were highlighted. After all, we are called Dumbledore's Army for a reason. This..." and she pointed around, "my not be what any of us would call moral. Or... easy. But it's all we've got."

Ginny sighed and cleared her throat before she started to speak. "We do bring in our own ideas. We train ourselves. Not everything is conducted by Dumbledore, however, the initial ideas came from him. What I said earlier..." she blushed a little "is true. And yet... his plan is to destroy You-Know-Who. And if that is only achieved by forming true allegiances... and by giving up personal pride, then so be it."

Snape let himself fall into one of the comfortable chairs. He picked up his glass, quickly refilled it and drank it in one go.

Neville, Ginny and Luna gave a sigh of relief. They had learnt that this was a good sign.

Neville, as usual, quickly came to the practical aspect. "Everything that happened in this room tonight will be kept under the Fidelius Charm. And the Unbreakable Vow. After the death of Harry's parents, we don't consider the charm alone safe enough. The secret keeper... Luna... also has to take the Unbreakable Vow. That means..."

Ginny brushed him off. "He knows what it means."

The three scrutinised their former professor and current headmaster.

Ginny thought that she would never, ever see the old git as a human being, but the difference from what she had seen in the past six years and from what she saw now was so brutal that it made her dizzy. The idea alone of Snape... _Snape _turning a kettle on seemed so utterly ridiculous to her that she had never even thought about it. To her, he was always the tall, scary man in black who hated _Harry_, who hated _her _and every Gryffindor. Who seemed to be on the wrong side. Who seemed to have no other emotion but anger toward his students and perfection toward his work.

And now, after having seen him in so much pain, unbearable pain, she couldn't help but feel sorry for him. The thought that he fought completely alone with absolutely no allies or friends, hated by everyone, no matter which side they were on... hurt her. She even felt thankful for the man who had protected and helped _her _Harry so many times. She realised now, that Harry probably had to thank him more than anyone else that he was still alive and well.

With a deep sigh that sounded as if she had been through more than any sixteen-year-old should have been, she picked up those damn cigarettes of Luna's. She was able to light without a wand. If You-Know-Who didn't kill them, then these certainly would. She vowed to stop if she ever survived this war.

"Well..." she started, "let's just finish the charm, do the vow and go to bed." She looked at Snape who seemed not to have slept for months. Maybe he hadn't. "We could all do with some sleep."

"You will cast it." Neville stated. "Because only with your death will all this be revealed. And if you are dead, the need to keep the secret won't be as high, because you are in the most dangerous position. And we could always cast a new one..."

"I don't think," Luna started, "that you should talk about people's deaths so conversational and functionalistic."

Neville rolled his eyes.

"Okay," he continued. "Luna will be secret keeper. If anything happens to her, I will be. Ginny will be locker."

"Wait..." Snape said. "It is impossible for Luna to be secret keeper if she has to take the Unbreakable Vow afterwards."

Neville was confused. "Why?"

"Think, Longbottom. Professor Dumbledore demanded that I will keep the students safe. I will not break that promise. I am headmaster on Dumbledore's Orders. And I cannot allow any student to be in a position like the one of the secret keeper. Do you understand, that if the Dark Lord or his followers ever interrogated Miss Lovegood, she would most certainly die if she ever broke the vow."

"But, anyone interrogated by the Dark Lord will die anyway!" Ginny stated.

"Not necessarily, no. Not if the Dark Lord senses, that he could get further information or find use for his captives. Miss Lovegood would be put into unnecessary danger if she becomes secret keeper. It has to be myself."

He expected gasping and protesting, but none of it happened. Maybe he had finally managed to gain _some _trust. Or maybe they knew that with the Unbreakable Vow he would be unable to spill any secrets anyway.

Luna nodded. "The professor is correct. With all his experience, I am sure he would find ways of withholding information in a way we would never be able to. Also... Professor Snape is the only one that has You-Know-Who's trust. And he wants to keep his promise to Professor Dumbledore."

She stood up and slowly walked over to Dumbledore's portrait. The late headmaster shot his piercing look at her, his eyes twinkling.

"Miss Lovegood," he said and bowed a little, "we can all be very proud to have you in Hogwarts. I too, would suggest that the position of the secret keeper is held by Severus. He has my full confidence." With that, he disappeared.

Snape relaxed a little. Not only did Dumbledore give consent to his participation in his army, he also trusted him with the position of a secret keeper. His body stiffened a little when he thought about the terms the charm dictated. Now _he _was in the position to spill his darkest secret. To a student. Dumbledore knew that he only ever revealed things he was forced to reveal, so this was all part of the plan. Genius. Cruel, but genius.

Snape ran his hands through his greasy hair and massaged his temples. His headache was almost unbearable now. The tiredness and exhaustion was taking its toll.

"Very well. Miss Weasley. I take it you know how to cast the charm?"

Ginny nodded. "Miss Lovegood, you will be the locker. And Longbottom, you are witness."

Ginny raised her wand and made the complicated movements, muttering incantations. They all had to admire her accuracy.

Then Luna pointed her wand at Snape and searched for eye contact. "_Legilimens._" The black eyes, now flickering with so many emotions that it was impossible to read them all, were locked to the huge silvery-blue ones. Luna's eyes suddenly widened even further and her hand flew to her mouth, in order to suppress a scream.

Finally, Luna raised her wand, took a few seconds to normalise her breathing and whispered "Fidelio." As soon as they finished, they all leaned back and knew it had been done right. No one, even if they wanted to, was now able to give away any information about Snape being with them. Or about his true loyalties. Apart from him.

"Only one more thing. Let's make it quick," Neville said. He looked shattered.

"It is unwise to rush an Unbreakable Vow" Snape's remarked, some malice had found its way into his voice again and for the first time ever, Ginny, Luna and Neville were happy to hear it.

"Fine." Neville conjured quill and parchment and wrote the three parts down. He then handed it to Ginny, who nodded, then to Luna, who did the same.

Neville put forth his hand and Snape shook it. His face dark and grim. Ginny, in the role of the bonder, raised her wand.

Neville started, maintaining the eye contact with Snape.

"Will you, Severus Snape, promise to never spill the secrets of the most recent Fidelius Charm?"

"I will." Ginny's wand started sparking and a thread of red light escaped.

"Will you promise that you will help with the plan to destroy You-Know-Who?"

"I will."

"Will you promise to remain on our side?"

"I will."

Ginny cast the read thread and it wound around the clasped hands. Snape retrieved his hand first and broke the eye contact.

With a flick of a wand he created another door. Another room. The door flung open and revealed a large bed and a bedside table. Snape had absolutely no intention to sleep in the same room as them.

Luna conjured a brown paper bag and a weird, cotton _thing_.

"One thing the room cannot to is food, so Dobby supplied us." Knowing, that the man liked his privacy, she made it float into the room.

"What's the other thing?" Ginny asked, yawning.

"It's a dream catcher. I enchanted it myself."

She stuck it on the top of his bed and turned back. The fire had went out and she shivered a little before lighting it again.

"What time is it?" Ginny asked, just out of habit.

"Eight sharp." Neville replied dryly.

Ginny rolled her eyes. "Will you _ever _get fed up of that joke?"

Neville snickered and leaned back. The cigarettes and whisky made its rounds again.

Snape looked around with an unfathomable expression. Then he stood up and walked to his bedroom, as graceful as he possibly could and closed the door.


	9. Chapter IX TRAINING

**Training.**

"How long has he been in there?" Ginny tried hard not to sound worried. She _couldn't_ be worried.

"Not long enough I suppose," Luna answered dreamily.

Neville and Ginny rolled their eyes. They had already slept, ate, read, talked, duelled. Now they were just waiting. And pretending that they weren't.

They weren't even able to leave the room. The rule was, that if the room had been asked for time, everyone had to enter and exit it together.

_Terrible things happen to wizards who meddle with time._

"Maybe he is gone?" Neville asked.

Luna shook her head. Neville, all practical again, blushed a little. "Will he not need..."

Ginny snorted. "I'm sure he made himself an en-suite."

Luna pointed her wand at the muggle CD player they had found and the sound of bells and dreamy voices, not always hitting the right notes, escaped. Ginny, with a grim face expression disarmed her with a silent _expelliarmus _and changed the music. The Doors. _The End_.

Snapes bedroom door opened and the headmaster, now fully composed, refreshed and rested, billowed in his ever intimidating manner to the kettle and switched it on.

When he felt three pairs of eyes sticking to his back, he quickly turned around and folded his arms around his chest and glared at them.

"Nice comeback," Neville muttered.

_This is the end... my only friend the end..._ The late Morrison sang in the backround._  
_

Snape frowned a little and turned around again to prepare his tea. "Rather fitting," he snarled. "The soundtrack of everyone's nightmares."

Ginny huffed a little and turned it off.

"So..." with a cup in his hand, Snape walked to the chair in front of the fire and joined them. "Longbottom, Lovegood, I want to see what you have learnt here. Duel."

Luna offered Snape one of her cigarettes, but he hesitated. "Miss Lovegood, under normal circumstances I would make you eat those. One by one."

Neville chuckled. "Give us normal circumstances and I will do it for her."

Snape's face showed no reaction, but he accepted them. The alcohol and the cigarettes were somehow part of all this. They symbolised a certain... determination and carelessness for the own health. People who were sentenced to death or to many years of jail suddenly started to smoke again.

Luna and Neville raised from their seats and bowed to each other. Then, silently, Neville threw the first hex at her, but she dodged it. After a while, the hexes and curses flew so fast that Snape couldn't help but be impressed.

Stunning spell after stunning spell escaped from Neville's wand, but Luna was able to shield every single one of them. With a silent _avis_, Neville managed to cast some nasty birds who went straight for her wand, but Luna combated that with an _aguamenti_.

Finally, Neville managed to come closer to Luna, pointed his wand quickly at her feet, looking out of breath and distressed now and shouted: "_Locomotor Mortis_". Luna, busy trying to defend herself, did not notice, that Neville was neither out of breath nor distressed, but instead had pointed his other hand at her wand and performed a silent accio spell.

Her wand flew in his direction and landed in her hand.

Both grinned at each other and bowed again. Ginny lit another cigarette and said: "One point for Neville. So that makes..." she picked up a little writing pad which opened at the correct page "One hundred and fifty points for Neville, one hundred and forty four for Luna and one hundred and fifty three for me. Gryffindor is in the lead." She grinned at Snape. "I'm sure you will catch up."

Neville and Luna sat down, not wanting to show, that they were eager to hear some praise from their former Defence Against the Dark Arts Teacher and Potions Master.

Snape remained silent for a few seconds, then cleared his throat and started.

"Longbottom. Your apparent dim-wittedness and slowness will be your greatest strength."

Neville frowned a little, trying to make sense of Snape's words.

"Do not even try to look smart or fast. Try to retrieve that open-mouthed amazement you were showing in your first years, combined with the insecurity that was painted all over your face. No one will expect the skills you have shown today. Ten points for Gryffindor."

Neville grinned a little and Snape said: "Yes, exactly like that."

Luna and Ginny laughed, then Snape continued. "Lovegood. Before you duel, do try to inform your opponent about the devastating effects of blibbering humdingers on the digestive system. You are a fairly able occlumens, so you can concentrate on one spell, but say another. And no-one would be surprised if some of your spells are invented and would break anyone's tongue but yours. Your strength lies in the speed you cast spells, but you concentrate too much on protection and not enough on surprising the opponent."

Snape went back to the kettle and wanted to prepare another tea. He was used to making one cup, so was a little surprised when Neville said: "Green milk please. Thanks."

Snape sighed and prepared four cups.

"What are you going to teach us, professor? That spell you used to cut George's ear off..."

Snape made a grimace and brushed her off. "That was an accident Miss Weasley."

"I know. I asked you when you took the veritaserum."

Snape obviously didn't want to be reminded of last night's events and remained silent.

"Sorry I brought it up. And sorry I..."

"It doesn't matter."

Ginny had not missed out on opportunities to mention the George-mishap outside the classroom. For weeks now, she commented every single one of his remarks with '_ear _'_ear_. When he gave her a lecture about behaving irresponsibly, that she would just show him her most earnest face and apologise for her _ear_-responsibility. Even though that was before she knew which side he was really fighting for, she felt a little embarrassed.

Snape glared at her and suddenly roared: "Keep your mind _shut_, Weasley."

All three of them startled in their seats.

Pleased, that he still had the ability to intimidate his students, he continued.

"I will teach you to keep your mind shut at all times. None of this can be revealed to the Dark Lord. His talent in legilimency is phenomenal. I will also teach you to cast silent spells, while hiding them under your occlumency shield, but say another. I will teach you the art of wizard resuscitation and muggle resuscitation. Further, you will become familiar with protective spells that are almost impenetrable. I will also try and improve your skills in wandless magic and muggle fighting. Also, you will have to learn how to maintain information while being interrogated by Death Eaters or the Dark Lord himself."

Ginny, Neville and Luna nodded solemnly.


	10. Chapter X BAD MOOD

**Bad Mood.**

Ginny, Neville and Luna stood once again, on the seventh floor, trying to get into the Room of Requirement.

Neville showed a nasty bruise on his forehead, a present from Amycus Carrow after he had given him the cheek again. Ginny, still weak after Crabbe's Cruciatus Curse rubbed her temples. The headache was unbearable. Luna, neither bruised nor tortured seemed to be the most worried. Her dad had been cornered by the Death Eaters and had yet again, faced their threats.

Neville walked three times back and forward, mumbling commands to the room.

After they entered, Luna sat down on the sofa, deep in thoughts and lit one of her infamous cigarettes. Neville and Ginny went through the potions, hoping that Snape had been in here, brewing some. He had.

Grateful, Neville picked up the healing potion and Ginny the one Snape had recommended to take after exposure to the cruciatus.

"God," Ginny said, "Crabbe is getting good at this. I hate this year. Did you see what Goyle did to the blond first year girl?."

Luna nodded sadly. "Her name is Jennifer. She is in my house. She wants to go home. It took half the night calm her down, she wouldn't stop crying. Before she came here, she was so excited. Then the blood quills... and muggle studies. The half-bloods aren't taking it too well."

Neville walked to the kettle and took his shirt off. His body was covered in bruises and welts, but he didn't whine. He didn't put any potion on his face, that would have been too suspicious. Without a word, Ginny helped rub them on, wincing when she saw what these beasts had done to him.

"What did Goyle do to her?" Neville asked, wanting to distract from his own bruises.

Ginny shivered before she started talking. "He dangled her upside down... then told her that You-Know-Who is killing all the muggles and their spouses and when she goes back home, no one will be there. And then he... called her names. I won't even recall them. He also told her that the pure-bloods will be allowed in all the girl's dormitories and..."

A single tear slid down Ginny's cheek. "There will be rape and murder next. What a horrible year." She took a glass and threw it at the wall.

Suddenly, all three of them flew threw the air and before they knew it, they were cursed will full body binds.

They fell into the chairs that quickly came flying.

"Snape, stop it," Ginny cried. This didn't help her headache at all.

Snape took off the transparency charm and presented himself in full Death Eater kit. The three of them gasped. They had never seen it and didn't particularly like it.

Then he took the mask off, pulled the hood back and his tired, sallow face appeared.

"Where are your guards? Did I not teach you _anything_?"

"We think it's safe in here, Snape. Out there you would be the one in the body bind," Neville answered back angrily.

"Nowhere is safe, Longbottom. Keep your guards up at all times."

"Can you take the curse off, please?" Ginny asked. "My head is killing me."

Snape sat down on the sofa and smirked into his tea. "I think you are able to do this yourselves."

The three of them sighed and started working. Ginny was the first to get rid of the curse. She was the first to manage a silent and wandless finite incantatem. Then, just as silently, she got her wand with an accio and freed her friends.

Neville wanted to rub more potion on his arms when Snape came over to him, scrutinizing the injuries. "Who did this?"

"Amycus Carrow."

Snape made an ugly grimace and went to get a painkilling potion. "You need to keep your head down, Longbottom. Drink this."

Neville drank and then shook his head. His face didn't even change at the disgusting taste of the potion, he was getting used to it.

"I can't. You know... when Harry stood up to... you or Umbridge it gave us all hope."

Snape winced as if this was the most stupid comment he had ever heard and turned to Ginny. She still showed the signs of having been exposed to the cruciatus.

"They will kill if you are not careful. The Carrows have no mercy whatsoever."

"Surely, they can't _kill _us?" Ginny was a bit distressed.

"Oh yes, they can. And the Dark Lord will not be interested in your headaches either."

Apart from the crackling fire, there was no sound for quite a while. Luna sat in her favourite comfy chair, cross legged, her head resting in her hands.

"Daddy doesn't keep his head down either," she said hoarsely. Tears were dripping down her face and fell on her legs. She quickly wiped her face.

"Merlin, I'm _scared_." Ginny walked over to her and hugging her. Snape turned away uncomfortably.

"Just tell me... that it will all be worth it in the end?"

When Severus realised, that Luna had directed this question towards him. He could hardly tell her that there was a chance the Dark Lord would die if Potter ever tried to defeat him. But... that all his sacrifices had been in vain because the ultimate plan was Potter to die, too. Or that they were all just pawns in Dumbledore's great plan. So he did what he could do best and lied.

"It will be."

Snape raised from his seat and started brewing potions.

* * *

In the next chapter Snape will get attacked by a bunch of students and guess who will defend him. 

Okay and... I think this story is jinxed, is the summary shite? I get hardly any hits or C2s... And only two people commented, but I got so many comments and hits on the other stories. So be honest, is it pish or just hard to find? Please please comment...


	11. Chapter XI ATTACK!

**ATTACK**

Dinner in the Great Hall was, as usual, tense. Not even the Slytherins seemed to enjoy themselves anymore. The food was tasteless. The house-elves had decided that one way of protesting against the new regime was to cook bland food.

And it was supposed to be the Christmas Party and the last dinner before Christmas. Tomorrow, everyone went home for the holidays.

Neville peeked over to the Ravenclaw table. Luna looked pale and worried. Ginny, who sat next to him, didn't look much better. They hadn't given up hope. With the enchanted galleons, they were able to meet in the Room Of Requirement. Most of the time, the whole army met, but sometimes they were able to meet Snape and train with him. Neville had learnt more than fifty curses and twenty protective charms in the past few weeks. They had passed the knowledge on to the army and the duelling was now so... professional. Neville had endured interrogation without giving away anything but false information, even though the cruciatus curse was used by the Carrows. Everyone was able to perform basic occlumency, so even with legilimency the secrets were never found out.

Dumbledore's Army wasn't a gang of teenagers anymore. Most of the members had come of age. No one had betrayed them. Veritaserum interrogations were no use, because Snape never did produce veritaserum, just filled the vials with water. He took high risks.

Snape, wearing his most frightening scowl, raised from his seat to give his speech. On command, the Gryffindors, Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs made gagging noises and made an attempt to leave the Great Hall.

"SILENCE" he roared, his voice filled with hatred and disgust. McGonnagall, Sprout and Flitwick glared at him.

"Headmaster," Colin peeped. "I need to use the toilet. Can I please go?" Everyone, even a few Slytherins laughed. Neville heard many students say "me too" and Neville exchanged an uncomfortable look with Luna.

"Mr. Creevey," Snape said in a deadly voice that silenced everyone. "Two hundred points from Gryffindor for cheek."

Colin wasn't impressed. "We don't have that many left, _headmaster_." He spat the last word, then stood up and threw his chair on the floor.

The Carrows weren't on the table tonight. Maybe they had Christmas Dinner with You-Know-Who himself. In another dimension maybe, Neville would have laughed at the idea, but these days, there was nothing funny about Voldemort or his followers.

Snape raised his wand and pointed it at Colin. "Sit down." His voice was barely a whisper, his face expression murderous. Colin didn't care.

"NO!" he shouted, grabbed his brother and ran out the Great Hall. Everyone raised from their seats, apart from the Slytherins they made sure that their chairs crashed on the floor as well. The atmosphere had never been as tense.

Sprout, Flitwick and McGonnagall, who could sense the upcoming rising, quickly raised from their seats, not missing out on giving Snape the most evil glare they could come up with and escorted everyone out the Great Hall. They didn't notice, that not everyone followed.

Dumbledore's Army.

Neville, Ginny and Luna exchanged uncomfortable looks. Snape, now alone, towered in front of them, wand raised. He was now faced with fifty, well trained students, and he knew. Snape made eye contact with Neville, and suddenly he could hear Snape's voice in his head.

_Help me._

This shocked him more than anything the potions master had ever said. It was the first time in his life, that an adult had placed so much responsibility on him. And trust. This was the moment, Neville realised that all of this was real and one mistake could get them all killed. Even more responsibility than he had in the ministry when they had to fight Death Eaters because here, he was the leader and the Harry wasn't there. Neville knew that he wasn't able to tell everyone that Snape was on their side, even if he wanted to. It was too dangerous and the Fidelius Charm made it impossible anyway. His mind was racing.

Suddenly, the Door of the Great Hall closed and Ernie McMillan locked it. Neville's eyes followed him. Everything seemed to be in slow motion.

The Gryffindors, Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws looked tired, battered, angry, but not defeated. Finnigan, hot head as usual, cast a stunning spell at Snape who had already cast a protective charm.

Suddenly, more than twenty or thirty curses hit him and he nearly toppled over, but he managed to keep his balance. Someone laughed. Another twenty curses followed and Snape's protective shield broke. A neat burning spell hit his Dark Mark and he made a hissing noise before he fell to the floor with a loud thump.

"Sonorus" whispered Neville and climbed on a table.

"STOP!" he shouted as loud as he could and because the volume was enchanted, everyone held their ears.

"Are you _mental_? Do you know that they will kill you for this? Everyone knows that Snape is fighting for You-Know-Who. Do you really want him to come to your house and murder your parents like he did with Harry's? Or do you want a visit from Bellatrix, her cruciatus is the best, so I've heard. Our time to fight will come. Soon. But not yet. Until then, we need to at least appear as if we keep our heads down."

Ginny had also enhanced the volume of her voice and was shouting. "Get OUT! Everyone get out of here. NOW. Maybe we can change his memory and no one will find out. I can't believe you are being so stupid. Snape is bad, but you know who would really like his position?"

They all shook their heads.

"Fenrir Greyback" Luna said and everyone turned towards her. Her voice sounded more stern than usual. "Sometimes it is wiser to choose the lesser of two evils."

Everyone, but Luna, Neville and Ginny left. Luna hurried to Snape's side. The army had done a good job. At least Neville now knew that his they _could _fight Death Eaters, although the ratio would not be to their advantage in a real fight.

Neville was scared. Fifty against one. Snape had been able to shield most of the curses, but not all of them. And blood was seeping through his robe where the Dark Mark was. Snape had never let them see it and they never wanted to either.

"DOBBY" Ginny shouted and the house elf appeared within seconds. He took a look at the unconscious Snape and looked cheery. "It's not funny," Ginny shouted. "We are in grave danger if anyone finds out. Go check if the Room of Requirement and the seventh floor are clear. We need to take him up there to change his memory. Go!" Dobby disappeared and returned after a few seconds.

"A-All clear," he stuttered, grabbed Snape, Ginny, Neville and Luna and disapparated with them to the seventh floor before he disappeared again. Neville quickly muttered the commands and they entered.

Ginny quickly rolled up Snape's sleeve and Luna summoned healing potions. Neville swore.

Snape's lower arm was covered in blood, the Dark Mark was throbbing. After they put the potion on, the wounds neatly closed, but the skin still looked raw.

"Ennervate," Luna muttered and Snape woke up.

His breath heavy, his whole body shaking and his face white, he sat up. Wide-eyed, he examined his arm, then turned back to Neville. Before he could say anything, he threw up on the floor. Ginny quickly removed the mess. They all looked worried.

The headmaster rested his head in his hands, closed his eyes and after what seemed like an eternity, he was able to stand up and staggered to his room.

Luna and Ginny wanted to follow, but Neville held them back. "Leave him just now."

Then they heard loud swearing, things hitting the walls, objects being smashed and a loud tortured scream that made them flinch. Ginny and Luna burst out crying and had no idea what to do. Neville put the kettle on.

No sound came from the room. The silence, somehow was even more worrying.

"Do you think he is alright?" Ginny asked.

"I don't think anyone is." was Luna's reply.

When the door opened, everyone gave a sigh of relief. Snape, now billowing again, accepted Neville's tea and took a seat.

"I am sure that you are aware of the seriousness of the situation," he started, his voice back to normal. Neville was amazed how anyone could gain composure in that speed. He nodded.

"Your reaction was appropriate. I never thought the day would come that I have to tell Neville Longbottom... that he saved the day. You will tell everyone in the army that my memory has been altered. You will command them not to boast. No one will get punished this way. However, you have take better care of your members. If this happens again, the outcome may have severe consequences."

Neville agreed. "I will call a meeting as soon as we leave the room."

"I'm sorry that they attacked you," Luna said. "We should have..." Snape bent forward and stared at her. "No you shouldn't have," he said with a quiet voice.

* * *

Thanks for the reviews, that's me all encouraged again :D

**Padawan Jan-AQ**  
,

_I think that this is a good story. I'm just only interested in Snape and Harry stories, so that's why I haven't really been reading. I'm just scanning stories to see if they are Snape and Harry Gen fics, and if they are, I add them to my C2 groups where I have a lot of subscribers. That may be it. :_

Thanks :) Harry will come later, but he will be a bit older, just like the room...

**Maggie Ernst**

_Sorry for the false send. i am really enjoying your story. So many of the stories posted are clones of one another, it's nice to have one with an new concept. I think that you've got Snape right. The fact that he's on the right side doesn't mean he's not always cranky._

_I also like your emphasis on Luna and your choice to make the Griffindores rather sadistic to Snape_

They get better :) Thanks

**mioneweasley-witch**

_Don't feel discouraged! I read your message and decided to review. You're story is good and don't worry because you still have a lot more stuff that you can do with the story. I can't believe Snape is listening to them and abiding their orders! Then again, it is great that he has someone to show his real side to. I will continue to read your story and maybe I'll review for the next chapter. Don't worry, reviews will come. :D_

Snape has to. In there, he is not in charge, Neville is. And he needs to train the army, he has promised Dumbledore to keep them safe, so improving their skills would be his duty. But he is a goody of course. If he went back to his old ways, he would be in trouble. And I think Snape is talented in playing roles anyways, with Voldemort he is modest and accepts humiliation, etc, with Dumbledore all casual and honest, so with the D.A. he can be more himself...

**StoogegirlSilva**

_Hm... well, I found out about it from your comments in another one of your stories. Your summary might have to be more specific, like "Snape joins the DA blah blah blah..." If it'll have a ship, post the story in areas where that ship is recommended. Not like I'm the best to give advice, though; my stories don't have more than three or four reviews a chapter._

I need to review yours... you ROCK, as usual, thanks. Even though there will be no pairings, it's still mainly between Snape and Luna, so that's where they are now...


	12. Chapter XII INTERROGATION

**Interrogation. **

Amycus Carrow was having fun. He loved interrogations.

"So...," he started. "Who wrote this?"

Neville didn't answer. He knew who did, but he was not going to tell them.

Neville looked up. Someone had done a good job. _Dumbledores Army, still recruiting_ was written all over the walls. Must have been enchanted paint. Probably from the twins.

Amycus dragged him by the hair into the dungeons, into his Office.

"Who." _Kick_. "Wrote." _Kick_. "This." _Kick_.

Neville lay on the floor, panting for breath. Snape had taught him how to magically fend off kicks, but Neville only used it a little, he didn't want that fact found out. If he hadn't used it at all, his ribs would have been broken.

"It was me."

"_LIAR_!"

He felt Carrow's foot kicking his face and as if in slow motion, he heard his nose crack and blood seeping on the floor. They were getting worse every day. The boundaries were pushed further and further and Neville shuddered at the thought of none being left.

He looked up to the man he now, straight after Voldemort, he hated most and with a shock, he saw him unbuckle his belt. He couldn't believe that he was going to get belted. What was happening to Hogwarts. And where was Snape when he needed him?

Neville's mouth fell open when he saw that Carrow made no attempt to take the belt off, but instead started to unbutton his trousers with one hand, the other hand held his wand and pointed at him. No. That couldn't happen. Not here.

Neville slowly raised his hands in defeat, tears and blood dripping down his cheeks and said: "Wait. I will tell you." His voice sounded far away. Carrow grinned his horrible grin and stopped for a moment.

"So this is what you are scared of? _Good _to know, _good _to know my boy."

Neville slowly stood up, hands still raised and stared at Carrow. Then, with a quick wandless and silent expelliarmus he disarmed him and with an accio the wand flew towards him. He put a full body-binding-curse on the 'professor'.

"You will die for this Longbottom. And your gran will, too," he screamed, his voice suddenly sounding high and angry, as if betrayed from a wonderful pleasure.

Neville knew that he would have to hide now. There was no way he could still attend any lessons.

"Dobby," he whispered, running up the stairs to the seventh floor. The house elf appeared immediately. "Go fetch Snape, bring him to the seventh floor. Do not be seen. Check if the Room is empty. Now."

Without a word, Dobby disappeared again. The coin in Neville's pocket was burning. In a certain rhythm. Neville recognised the morse code for L. A short one, a long one, two short ones. It was Luna. She was supposed to be on the train home now. The Carrow's didn't let Neville take it, otherwise he would have been on there, too. Then, the coin started burning again. Three short ones, three long ones, three short ones. SOS. They had captured her. Then, no more messages came. Neville kept running, leaving a trail of blood behind him, not noticing that this would lead everyone to him. Seventh floor. No one was there. Maybe Snape had put a Disillusionment Charm over himself. When he saw the trail of blood moving and leading somewhere else, he knew that Snape was just in front of him. He quickly muttered the commands and entered.

When the door closed, he collapsed on the floor and as if from a distance he heard _episkey _and _scourgify_.

Snape took the Charm off and was hovering above him, looking mad.

"That's Amycus Carrow's wand!" he shouted, anger written all over his face. "You stupid boy! I told you to keep your _HEAD _down!"

Neville filled with fury, couldn't believe what he heard. "He was interrogating me, wanting to find out who wrote all over the walls. He broke my nose and was going to rape me!"

Snape froze. "Why didn't you obliviate him prior to your escape?"

Neville stood up. He was itching to hit someone. Or something. He pushed Snape hard, but the professor wouldn't react. Or fall. Or do anything.

"Maybe," Neville roared, "I was a bit preoccupied trying to save my life. How could you ever join those beasts? They are _evil_!"

Snape didn't react to the accusation which drove Neville even madder. "They've got Luna. Captured her. What will they do to her? And they'll get gran, too."

Neville flung himself on the sofa and was unable to control himself anymore. He felt defeated. All hope was lost. Voldemort was winning. Everything had been in vain, they were stronger and... Neville started sobbing, not caring if Snape was in the same room as him anymore. He wanted to pour himself some of the whisky, but the glass and the bottle just smashed on the floor. His body started shaking and he was going to pass out when he felt a hand on his shoulder and heard the words: "Drink this. Calming draught." Neville didn't react. Snape pulled his head back and poured it down his throat. Neville felt as if he was going to be sick, but Snape quickly poured another potion down his throat and the feeling vanished.

"And this," he said quietly. "Dreamless sleep potion." A third vial was poured down his throat and Neville passed out.


	13. Chapter XIII HARRY

**Harry. **

Harry Potter stood in front of Dumbledore's portrait, cursing himself for giving in to Dumbledore's meddling. He had been obsessed about time travel, time turners for years after Voldemort's fall but had finally made peace. The ministry had destroyed all time turners, in case someone wanted to go back in time and resurrect him. And now... Dumbledore had convinced him to do it all over again? He wasn't willing to take the risks anymore, not after his two sons were born. Dumbledore had been the one who always told him to live in the present...

"Harry," Dumbledore was beaming, his eyes twinkling mad. "All you have to do is apparate into the Room of Requirement. With an elf."

Harry was a little confused, but then remembered. Ginny had told him that Neville had found a way to stop time. Snape, Luna, Neville and Ginny had trained there for the battle. The room must have been older than the rest of Hogwarts. Dumbledore gave Harry a beaming smile, knowing that he had just figured it out.

"Well...," Harry started. "If I am correct, I will meet Ginny, Luna, Neville and Snape? Because they were the ones who did the time thing..."

Dumbledore nodded. "It will be the 20th of December. The day Miss Lovegood was captured and Miss Weasley was on her way home. There will only be Mr. Longbottom and Professor Snape. You will not be able to give any information that will change the events... Apart from one. And you must not be seen by Mr. Longbottom. He will be sleeping when you arrive."

"Who am I to save?" Harry knew already, but didn't really want to believe it. If he had the choice, he would have saved Remus and Tonks. Or Fred. Yes, he did have enormous respect for Snape and yes, he did want him to survive and his death was unfair and unnecessary. But... George was still a regular visitor of St. Mungo's. He had finally stopped saying 'I'm Fred' when someone addressed him as George, but he was still so very unwell. The happy, funny and ever positive George was gone. Harry sighed.

"And how do I know that I won't say anything that will change the... outcome of the battle?"

Dumbledore smiled again. "Because I have required it. I know quite a bit about the Room."

"How can the Room Of Requirement know so much?"

Dumbledore chuckled. "It is as bright as the wizard, Harry."

Harry nodded. He was supposed to trust again. Blind trust. With a sigh, he ordered Winky the house elf and apparated into the room. He would never forgive himself for declining. It would consume him entirely and he had no desire for that feeling again.

The Room was large, but not quite as large as when he had last seen it. It didn't have the ship-like appearance and there weren't quite as many hammocks yet. He peered over to the sofa and saw a sleeping Neville. On the other side of the room was a door. _Must be Snape's_, Harry thought quickly, took a deep breath and walked towards it.

Quicker than he could think he found himself pinned to the wall. His head bumped painfully against it.

"Who are you?"

"Harry James Potter, sir. I came from the future."

"Impossible," Snape snarled. Harry regarded him. He looked pale, almost as pale as he did when he was dead. His black eyes sparked with rage.

"What did you see when you broke into the pensieve."

Harry was confused. What did _that _have to do with anything? Then he realised that this was supposed to a security question to ensure it was really him.

"P-potions exams...," he stuttered. "And then my dad and..." he felt the grip loosen a little.

"You are alive. Am I correct in the conclusion that the Dark Lord has survived as well?"

A small smile appeared on Harry's face. "So this is what it feels like to know more about the bigger picture. And to only give out certain information..."

"Quit your wallowing, Potter."

"Right. Vol-" Snape quickly put a hand on Harry's mouth. Of course. The name was jinxed back then. "You-Know-Who killed me. And I died. But because I was willing to die I didn't. Then I came back and killed him with _expelliarmus_. I was the owner of the the wand he held. It wouldn't turn against me, so his killing curse rebound and he died. That was eight years ago."

The grip lessened even more, but Snape still wouldn't let him go.

"Who told you that you will have to die?"

"You did. You gave me your memories after Nagini bit you. You were dying, but asked me to take them and... look at you."

The grip got tighter again and Harry made a gagging noise.

"I-I activated my mum's portrait," he stuttered, "she was so grateful. She told me to tell you that... she forgives you and she was sorry." All the remaining colour left his face. Harry felt that he had to say more. Snape didn't believe him.

Snape shook his head. "Impossible," he whispered. "I only asked for her to be saved, not your father. Or you."

"_Do _grow up, Snape. You were forced into a position where you had to trade lives. If... Malfoy had Ginny and they had a son and a prophecy was made about him I would have been on my knees trying to trade his life for hers. I didn't join the Dark Side, but if You-Know-Who had been the first to introduce me to magic and take me away from the Dursleys I might have."

The grip around Harry's collar finally loosened a little. The position didn't change, Harry was still pinned against the wall, but Snape seemed to use his collar now to support his own weight. Harry kept going. The words he had wanted to say for so many years just tumbled out his mouth, as if he prepared a speech. "Also... you were rescued from that terrible home of yours by the Dark Side. And the other side... was nothing but nasty. My dad was an arse back then and I want to apologise for his behaviour. I know it's too late for that but... I'm also sorry I looked into your pensieve and didn't try hard enough to learn occlumency."

Harry searched for contact. Snape stared at him, his eyes piercing. Harry knew what he was doing and let him. Snape needed to know if Harry was being honest. After what seemed like an eternity, he broke the contact.

"Why are you here?" Snape asked, his voice thick with emotion.

"Dumbledore sent me to... to give you the information that will save your life."

Snape made an odd sound. "It might have escaped his notice," he hissed, "that I have no wish to survive this war."

Harry had expected that. "Well," he started, " it may have escaped _your _notice that even in the after life, and yes, there is one, I've been there, my parents will still be married. You can choose to watch them together for all eternity..." the grip around his collar tightened again, "or maybe give life another chance. I named my son after you and maybe you would want to..." he stopped when he took another look at Snape's face.

He winced when he saw how much his former potions master was struggling to keep his composure. It was painful to watch. Harry wondered if he had made a mistake and all he did was make Snape's last months even more miserable and wouldn't be able to save him at all. The grip around his collar tightened again, but this time the hand that held it was shaking and Snape was using it in order not to collapse.

"Hey," Harry said softly, now knowing what he had to do. Snape's breath escaped with a shaky hissing noise. Harry removed the trembling hands from his collar. Then he put his own hand on Snape's shoulder, drew him closer and encircled his arms around him. He could hear the breathing next to his ear and did something Luna had taught him. He concentrated as hard he possibly could and his hands, firmly placed on Snape's back, started glowing.

It took several minutes before he regained his composure but finally managed and pushed himself away to sit down. Harry nearly fell.

Harry quickly transformed a cup into a chair and sat down, too. He was most uncomfortable.

"Where are your glasses, Potter?" Harry hadn't expected that question.

"Um- I needed to get my eyes fixed to become an auror. Done it the muggle way, so that no counter-spell could..." he was sure that Snape was absolutely not interested in laser operations and stopped himself.

"You are an auror?"

"Actually," Harry said, who still didn't like to boast but somehow wanted Snape to know that he was an adult now and able to do things "I was made head of the aurory this year."

Snape's raised his eyebrows. "Who is the minister?"

"Shacklebolt." Snape nodded.

"It was all worth it. You are a hero now... just hang on for the rest of the year... Keep a bezoar and blood replenishing potion with you all year. And one of those coins... _please_."

Snape looked doubtful, but seemed to seriously consider the opportunity.

"You could get the Defense job now, Snape," Harry said a little bit of cheerfulness in his voice. "The curse is lifted..."

Snape snorted sarcastically and Harry welcomed the familiar noise, accompanied by the good old scowl. The words however, surprised him.

"I never wanted it. It was one of those useful mythconceptions, planted by Dumbledore to serve the Greater Good."

Harry raised his eyebrows. "You would go back to Potions?"

Snape leant back on his seat and folded his arms across his chest.

"I would not go back to teaching at all, no. I have no patience for dunderheads."

Harry grinned. "You were a terrible teacher. Did you know that before my first ever class with you... I had really been looking forward to potions?"

"Indeed?" This seemed to take the older man by surprise.

"Yes. I was always good at cooking..."

Snape shook his head and an impatient expression appeared on his face. "You better go now. You mustn't be seen."

Harry nodded. "I hope I see you when I get back."


	14. Chapter XIV MISERERE MEI

Please, please I beg you, before you read this chapter, go on youtube, type in **Miserere Mei Deus - Kings College Chapel Choir** and click the first one. It is unbelievably beautiful. Imagine the little boy there is her son. This chapter is for Charity Burbage.

* * *

Severus Snape sat in the headmaster's Office, rubbing his forehead. Deep in thoughts.

One week ago, the decomposed, taken apart remainders of the body that once belonged to Charity Burbage had been dumped on her family's door step. Her husband, a muggle and her five sons were now in the Gryffindor Tower, talking to Minerva. Severus expected a knock on his door any time. Dumbledore pretended to sleep.

There it was. A stabbing pain shot through his torso and up his left arm and he had to suppress a shiver. It took an extraordinary amount of self-discipline to school his expression.

"Enter."

Minerva strode in, angry, confident and intimidating, her lips a thin line.

For a moment, Severus was sure that she was going to attack him. Not by magic. But instead, she banged both her hands on the table and gave the fiercest, darkest and most hateful look she was capable of.

"How could you?" she snarled. Severus raised his eyebrows and observed the sweat marks Minerva had left on his desk. Dumbledore's desk.

"Were you there when they killed her? What did they do to that poor woman? You are all monsters. You _disgust _me, Severus!"

There was that stabbing pain again.

"Careful here, Minerva." His voice didn't sound half as threatening as he intended it to be. Angry tears sprung to her eyes and she did nothing to hide them.

"Charity's family is standing outside. Her husband said that she would have wanted the funeral to be here. They demand a proper ceremony and acknowledgement and if you have any human traits left, you allow it or you can have your war right now. This woman worked here for years and has never done anything to anyone."

She drew her wand and pointed it at him. Severus was faster and they both stood, glaring and pointing. Either of them sure that the other one was angry enough to cast an Unforgivable.

"Minerva..." She turned around to face Dumbledore's portrait. "They can have their funeral. There are some rules here that cannot even changed by Death Eaters. Voldemort will want everyone to know that Charity is dead. To spread more fear. I do not believe that there will be any objections."

McGonnagal nodded and put her wand back.

"Thank you, Albus." Then she glared at Severus again. "You shouldn't be in here. In fact, you belong to Azkaban for the rest of your pathetic little life."

She stalked out. When the door was shut, Severus heard Dumbledore's portrait trying to console him.

"Albus. Do me a favour and do not talk to me."

* * *

The next night was filled with preparations for the funeral ceremony. Alecto and Amycus were not in the castle, in fact, they were not supposed to be back until later the next day. They were in Malfoy Manor, interrogating the prisoners. Severus pushed those thoughts away. His shift would start tomorrow and maybe... just maybe they were all still sane and alive and he could do something. The house-elves ran around frantically, decorating the Great Hall with black ribbons and muggle condolence cards, black roses, a picture of Charity Burbage when she was younger, preparing meals and looking after the guests. Minerva and the Burbage family, whom Severus hadn't seen yet and wasn't particularly keen to meet, were nowhere to be seen.

* * *

He shouldn't be here. And yet, it was his duty. He had to make his presence known. Spread fear. The pale headmaster strode through the great hall, billowing dangerously. He emanated an enormous amount of confidence and threat. Both of which he did not feel in possession of. He sat down on a seat that shouldn't be his and glared into the hall. Yes, he was grateful for the fearful, yet admiring looks his Slytherins had for him. And the almost unnoticeable, but nonetheless reassuring smile Weasley gave him.

McGonnagal stood up and waved the Burbage family in. Her husband, a chaotic and grief-stricken looking man with grey hair and a ponytail made his way in. Followed by five boys. The oldest one couldn't have been much older than Potter, the youngest was maybe nine or ten years old. They had all inherited her dark-blue eyes and long, brown lashes. The youngest boy stared straight at Severus. As if he knew. He wondered, if it was his fate to be stared at by ghost eyes of children whose parents had been murdered. Murdered with his assistance. He suppressed a shiver and broke the eye contact. And yet, he could feel the blue eyes staring at him. Through him. The man held a speech, but Severus could only concentrate on small pieces. The constant use of calming draught seemed to finally have an impact on his ability to focus.

"- has always been obsessed about the benefits of the 'muggle world' on the wizarding world -"

"- despised the term 'non-magic people' -"

"- wanted to make use of the Internet which enables to send messages and pictures within milliseconds -"

"- telephone, which allows us to speak to each other, disregarding the distance -"

"- space journey -"

Severus sighed inwardly when he saw that even the Slytherins were hanging on the man's lips and practically soaked up every word. There would be a lot of explaining to do to the Dark Lord. He wondered just how many _Cruciatus _it would take until he finally lost his mind.

"And now, my boys have decided to honour their mother by singing her favourite piece of music. She used to call it Muggle Magic. Gregorio Allegri. Miserere Mei Deus.

The man straightened, took out a tuning fork, hit his knuckle with it and then hummed five different tones. The student's eyes widened slightly.

Snape's head shot up when they started singing. The treble (boy soprano), her youngest son, seemed to aim his voice directly at him. Somehow _into _his head. Snape couldn't look at the little boy but instead stared at the man-sized picture of Charity. The most harmonic, beautiful and unspeakably sad and mournful sound any of the students and professors had ever heard, filled the Great Hall. The boys didn't need a spell to enhance the volume, they were able to make it carry and fill the hall entirely. The young boy's voice, impossibly high and clear broke into a whimper, then he continued singing.

McGonnagal next to him kept dabbing her eyes, so did Trelawney.

There it was again. This whimper. Exactly placed where it should be and yet, painfully raw and real. It was obviously part of the piece. The little boy was now looking down, but kept singing, tears streaming down his pointy face.

After an eternity, they were finished. The rest of the ceremony passed in a blur. The glares he received were cutting, they had never before been as hateful. Most of the people around him would have liked to see him in that coffin, half-eaten. His occlumency shields were raised, he couldn't read anyone's thoughts.

But he knew.


End file.
